Tracy: Son this isn't easy for me to say because my tongue caught what my foot has...
Tracy: I didn't get to work an hour late just to be the first one here.
Tracy: I never even taught him how to orangutan.
Durr: All they teach us now is how to build roller coasters and Survivor challenges.
Jenna (to Hazel): Oh, poor baby. Can't hack it in the big city? Gonna move to the bay area now, pretend that that was your dream the whole time? Have fun always carrying a light sweater.

Kim Jong Il: I'm greatest waiter of all time.
Kenneth: Look at us laughing a couple of Jews watching The Daily Show.
Jack (as Tony): We've got a great show. At least that's what the Jews I pay tell me.
Tracy: You're still here! You didn't go to the store for milk and heroin and then never come back.
Liz: That was his excuse?
Paul: I may have a dress, and a wig, but I am the man.